The End

OK, so here is the end of this IVF story….

After the pregnancy blood work test was positive, I had to continue giving blood to ensure the HCG levels were rising.
Tues, Nov 18th  - 47
Fri, Nov 21st - 186
Mon, Nov 24th - 529
Wed, Nov 26th - 991
Fri, Nov 28th - 1753
Once they reach above 1500, they do an ultrasound.

We had this ultrasound today.

This little black dot in the middle is our sweet little's gestational sack where it is growing strong and is the appropriate size for the 5 weeks and 4 days along that I am.

And the answer of the 1, 2, or 3 littles is….

1
We are adding 1 little Kucera Stocking to our family tree.

Baby Kucera is come July 27th, 2015 ish!

It took a moment to change my expectations about only having 1 kiddo instead of our family being completely with twins or triplets, BUT I realize that we get to have a completely different story!

God definitely has a different story for our lives and all the kiddos we are going to add to our family. SO this just means that our story is not over yet!

A beautiful poem I read that just made my heart happy knowing we are exactly where God wants us right now.

My life is but a weaving between my Lord and me;
I cannot choose the colors He worketh steadily.

Oft times He weaveth sorrow And I, in foolish pride,
Forget He sees the upper, And I the underside.

Not til the loom is silent And the shuttles cease to fly,
Shall God unroll the canvas And explain the reason why.

The dark threads are as needful In the Weaver's skillful hand,
As the threads of gold and silver In the pattern He has planned.”

― Unknown

And His plans are so much better then our plans!

I cannot wait to see what He has in store for us.

And meanwhile…. I have a little one growing in me! And there are so many things that we get to experience with this little! And I cannot wait!

I AM PREGNANT!!! EEeeekkkk!!!!

PS… For those of you interested in the IVF part, I get to have visits (including ultrasounds) with Dr Murrain the entire first trimester. I get to continue the aspirin, the estrodial, and the progesterone shot for the entire first trimester. Welp, I might get to switch from the progesterone shots to a creme at 8 weeks if all goes well! And now that we know how many, I get to find a midwife to help me bring this little into the world in 34.5 weeks!

WE ARE PREGNANT!!!

I honestly don't even know where to start with this post.

Tuesday was a crazy day. My emotions ranged from excited, to scared, to terrified, to calm to my stomach aching, and back to excited, scared, terrified and then back to calm once I had given it to God again. And Thomas was at work and IMing me the whole day. And he wasn't in any better shape! We were a mess.

One minute I was completely content knowing that God has the whole thing under control. I know that He already has our story written, but then the next I would have this dread, of what could happen. 

I love that so many of my friends sent me verses Tuesday morning.

Philippians 4:6-7 - Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.

Psalm 27:14 - Wait for the Lord; be strong and take heart and wait for the Lord.

Psalm 18:30/2 Samuel 22:31 - As for God, his way is perfect: The Lord's word is flawless: He shields all who take refuge in him.

So thankful for all of you that helped me get through those early morning hours!!!!

8 AM:

I headed into the Gyft clinic at to get my blood draw.

Mary informed me that I would get a call between 12 & 3 pm.

Thomas came home at 11:45.

And we waited. 

And waited.

And waited.

12:52 PM:

Charlene Called.

We jumped up, I answered the phone, and quickly had her wait, while I put it on speaker phone. I didn't want to miss one word. I then told her I was ready.

Her words were... The test was positive.

Thomas squeezed my hand and I said, Oh yay.

My HCG level was at 47.

I then talked through all the business parts, like when so I come in next for my blood work appointment, do I keep taking the progesterone shots and estrogen pills, etc.

 I ran out to take these adorable pictures, because I didn't want to assume and take them ahead of time.

And then we immediately called, texted, and posted the picture on FB for all of you.

That is right, you all knew within 30 minutes of Thomas and I knowing. Because that is how much we love you. And I would have busted if I had to keep it in!

And now the question is...

Are we having 1 Baby?

2 Babies?

Or 3 Babies?

And now we are pregnant. What does that even mean? It seriously is taking a little while to sink in.

But we are!

And now I get to keep taking the estrogen pills 3 times a day. And I get to keep getting a progesterone shot in my rear every evening. Hoping that stops at 8 weeks if all my levels look good.

And every 48-72 hours I go in for blood work to ensure that all my levels are doubling. They might have an inkling that there are multiples if the numbers go crazy. I cannot wait for my numbers tomorrow! 

And then in about 2 weeks (I am double checking that time frame with my nurse tomorrow), they will do an ultrasound and we will know how many. Eeek!!!

So our praying is not over! Pray the numbers keep going up and doubling. Pray that all of these babies that stuck are healthy and growing. And pray that my body does what it was created to do and that it will be a perfect safe haven for these littles.

And seriously. All of your love means the world to Thomas and I. I cannot believe that we had so many likes, comments, texts, and phone calls. You all have cheered us on in a crazy amazing way.

Thank you from the bottom of our hearts.

We love you.

As I Wait

As I watch the 10 days between implantation and the pregnancy test go by 1 by 1, this is where my heart it at.

These same days 3 months ago were filled with a cocky expectation that we were pregnant. I mean why wouldn’t we be? This was just going to happen. I mean every person I talked to “just had a feeling” that it was going to work.

This time around I am hesitantly hopeful. I know that again, this is another moment to cling to God. And honestly, during this week in August, I didn’t have to do that. This time round? Daily, momentarily I am giving these 3 little back up to God.

But I guess that is what parenting is all about, isn’t it? I was reminded just last month that parenting is the act of giving your kids back to God daily, knowing that He has allowed you to love, teach, and grow these children. He has gifted you these Littles for a time. And even though I am praying that I am carrying, 1,2, or 3 Littles right now, I am also praying for the wisdom of how to love them right now.

 He already has written our story. And I would not have taken back the last 3 years for anything. The whole thing has given Thomas and I another reason to strengthen our marriage. We have been a united force through every decision, and God has given us the exact same resolve for every decision.

So here we are... Just 4 more days until we get to take the blood test.
4 more days to daily give it to God, so I don't freak out.
4 more days to try and not psycho analyze every little twinge, every little cramp, every little "could be a pregnancy symptom!".
4 more days to believe that this really did work.
4 more days to have absolute faith.
Just 4 more days, 96 hours, and countless minutes.

Whew!
By the way, we found out on Tuesday that none of the other 7 little embryos turned into blastocysts.
So this is it people! This is our time.

Grow you 3 little buddies! Grow!

Hopefully #2 is already a reality and 3 will happen in 8 months!

Day 5 - Implant Day!!!

Last time around, my sweet friend Becky sent me 2 perfect quotes that I definitely needed at the time. This time around I was looking around on pinterest and saw that she has re-pinned this. And it of course was perfect. Because seriously, God has such a beautiful plan for Thomas and I's life and we are praying that it includes these little buddies, but we know He is ultimately in control.

But here is what you are all waiting for! 

We implanted 3 blastocysts!

Of our 10 little embryos, 3 of them turned in to blastocysts so far. Two of them were perfectly beautiful and 1 was good, but not perfect. You will see pics of them at the end.

This time around was a lot more of a struggle healing physically from the extraction and quite frankly I have no idea how people go through this 8 or even 4 times. Yes 8 times. Wow. 

This is the ultrasound when they implanted the 3 little buddies. To the left there is the big black area which is my bladder. My uterus is essentially the 2 white parallel lines. At the right end of the shorter line is where the little buddies were implanted.

So after we were all set up, Jeff (the embryologist) came in and told us we had 3 embryos. And we got to choose whether we wanted to put 1, 2, or 3 in. Before we walked in the doors we had decided on 3, so after a little discussion… 3 it is! Jeff told us that 2 of them were perfect and he wouldn't be surprised if we had twins. Triplets although it could happen, with the 3rd little blast not being perfect, he thinks it is highly unlikely. 

And so we wait.

If you want to read about everything that goes on during the implant process, you can read the Round 1 Implant post.

Here are the 3 blasts that we implanted.

Blastocyst #1 (perfect)

 Blastocyst #2 (good/ok)

 Blastocyst #3 (perfect)

So…. What is next?

Next we wait for a phone call either tomorrow (Sunday) or Monday, to see if any more blastocysts have grown for us to freeze.

AND THEN….

We wait for 2 weeks until a week from Tuesday (November 18th) to get some blood work done to see if I am prego!!!

And then…. 2 weeks later, we find out if there is more then 1! 

So much happening!!! Thank you all so much for your love, your prayers, and you cheering us on! We watched our embryo numbers go from 9 to 10, 3 blasts grow, and hope through out this whole process. 

I am amazed by all your love! And yes, I will be counting on you, my village to help me raise these awesome littles. Thank you for being on this journey with us! Can't wait to see where else it takes us all!

Day 3 - Transferred to Blastocyst Medium

This just got real! 

We got awesome news from Charlene today. 

We have 10 embryos!

Apparently we are multiplying! From 9 yesterday to 10!

So here are their numbers.

(The scoring is 4, 3+, 3, 2, and 1 with 4 being the best.)

2 - 10 cell embryos - score 4

1 - 8 cell embryo- score 4

3 - 7 cell embryos - score 4, 4, 4

1 - 6 cell embryo - score 3

2 - 5 cell embryos - score 3, 2

1 - 3 cell embryo - score 3

Last round we had a 10 cell with a 4 grade, 2 are 8 cells with 3+, 3+ , and 2 - 7 cells with 4, 3 grade. 

So we are doing much better this time round, clearly!

This was one of the pictures of our little embryos last during Day 3 Round 1.

So! Today Jeff our embryologist transferred our 10 little buddies into the blastocyst medium or as Charlene called it, "different embryo juice".

We have an appointment on sat at 10 to transfer some of these little buddies.

So here is what I need from you! Pray that at least half of them grow to blastocysts. Pray that we have wisdom with how many to transfer. Pray that all goes smoothly and that Thomas and I continue to heal from our extractions on Monday.

And seriously! Thank you all for how amazing you all are! I cannot tell you how much your prayers, comments, likes, and overall excitement for us has been huge for us! I mean, we grew another little embryo because of prayer! 

There will not be an update from the Gyft clinic tomorrow, but I might just write a bit on how I have been feeling and processes this whole round 2 shindig. Otherwise, you will hear from me on Saturday! Where it will be 4 days of bed rest for me. Yikes! I might need some company. :)

Day 2 - Cell Growth

Awesome News!

We are currently the proud parents of 9 little embryos!

Charlene told me all of our 9 little embryos scores.

The scoring is 4, 3+, 3, 2, and 1 with 4 being the best.

So drum roll please.....

6 of them are a perfect 4 (Eeekkk!!!)

2 of them are a 3

1 of them is a 2

So both our maybe's kicked their butts into gear!

Grow little buddies grow!

Which basically means we have 8 beautiful littles because we don't give up on anyone!

Last round we had 6 that survived, but only 5 were really good ones.

We are still praying for a Day 5 transfer which is Sat. However, we won't know if we are transferring tomorrow or sat, until they see how all these little guys do over night. So Charlene said that she would call me tomorrow to let me know. If they do implant tomorrow it will be in the afternoon. But I will keep you posted!

Next up will be choosing how many of them to implant! Clearly we have to choose the future college graduate ones, right?

Thank you again Emily, for this beauty.

This is what our little buddies looked like during Round 1 on Day 2.

So pray that they all thrive through the night! And that Jeff and Dr Murrain agree that we should wait for Day 5. And that they turn into blastocysts!

Just a few things to pray for, right? :)

Day 1 - Fertilization

I know it gets a little confusing with all the day counting. The first set was the counting of the days from the start of the cycle to the last day of shots.

This second day counting is from extraction to implantation. So here we go!

This was sent to me from a co-worker. :) I just love it. And yes, my littles are WAY wanted! Thank you Emily!

OK, but for today's updates!

They took out 24 eggs yesterday, but only 17 of them were mature (vs 13 mature last time).

For Thomas, they took out 4 seminiferous tubules (vs 3 last time).

All 17 of the mature eggs were ICSIed which means that all the eggs had sperm injected into them yesterday afternoon.

This morning, 7 of them fertilized normally and 2 showed signed of fertilizing (vs 5 and 2 last time).

This is awesome news! All we really need is more then 6 embryos to be maturing well past day 2, so that we can implant on day 5 vs day 3.

Let me explain that. The goal is to get to day 5 because at that point, the embryos have reached blastocyst. When they have reached blastocyst, they have a way better likelihood of surviving in the womb. The guidelines the Gyft clinic operate off of are that if there are 6 embryos or more on day 3, they will wait until day 5. Last time we only had 5 good embryos, so that is why we implanted on day 3. So this time the goal is more then 6! And we have 7, possibly 9!

Remember this picture from last round? These are not my cells, but it shows what the cells look like each day. This morning mine were the same as the first picture.

Because I won't get the DVD of my little guys until the day them implant, I will post the pics of what the looked like last round so you know.

This is day 1 nucleus from round 1. You can see the little beautiful nucleus on this top little embryo.

So! We have fantastic news! But we still need prayer. The prayer now is that all 7 of those little buddies, and possibly the other 2 buddies, grow and grow well! And that they will allow us to go to day 5, and the 7 will turn into blastocysts.

On a funny little note, after I texted a friend the numbers of fertilized eggs, she said, "I think you could do seven." I then responded with, "Seriously? Yikes. The thought stresses me out!" Her response was perfect. "Well I was being sort of facetious. I want three. Then you can say… we have eeny meeny miney and we don't want no mo." Hehe! Best response yet! Granted she also said I could have 7 not so dwarfs. You were on a roll Laura! hehe.

Thank you all for your love and support! I will let you know what we find out tomorrow! 

Extraction Day

We are finally here! 

Extraction Day!

I almost can't believe it. This second time was definitely longer during the whole shot process. It felt like it took forever! But here we are! It has arrived.

So I wasn't allowed to eat or drink anything after midnight last night. So when I woke up bright and early this morning at 6 am I was starving. Naturally I couldn't eat anything and when Thomas made toast it was near torture. 

So at 7:45 I took a valium and after about 15 minutes I started feeling a little off. Which was funny because last time I didn't feel a little off until right before I went in to the room. And this time, but the time I went back, I was completely coherent. I changed into the little gown and blanket and after Charlene got me all settled in, Dr Reddy gave me all the meds to knock me out!

Next thing I know, they are waking me up and letting me lay there a while. I get dressed and get wheeled out the door and home with Thomas. I definitely felt more sleepy this time around for a little while after the procedure.

They wanted me to have adult supervision during the 8 hours following the procedure, so when Thomas left at 1 for his little procedure, my sweet friend Robyn and her daughter Madison came to "babysit" me. Although little miss Madi informed her mom that, "We don't have to babysit Mica, she is a friend." :) I love kids logic!

So Thomas was off! Last time round he was in immense pain. Apparently this time around, Dr Kim did a wonderful job of numbing him, because he has been home 2 hours and is still numb and has not yet felt pain! Thank you Jesus!

So, this is what we walked away with today. They took 24 eggs out of me. Not 24 follicles like last time that only had 14 mature eggs in them, but 24 eggs. And last time they took 3 tubules from Thomas and this time they took 4 and Jeff said that he saw some good swimmers. 

So as I am typing this up at 3:45, Jeff is currently going through all the tubules to tease out the little swimmers. As soon as he does that, he will implant each mature egg with one of the swimmers. 

And in the morning he will go and see how many of them have matured. 

So… we wait until we got the phone call tomorrow that says how many of the mature eggs that were implanted with sperm, have fertilized. 

I will report out tomorrow!

And we are both feeling fine right now! Yay for a pretty seamless day!

Here we are before the procedure! And yes I am a little drugged here. I am not allowed to operate vehicles or machinery according to the label.

And this is how we do halloween. We drill holes in a pumpkin and fill it with lollypops. Cause we are either out and about or we are just too lazy to come to the door.

Tomorrow I will let you know how many eggs fertilize! Yay!!!

Final Shot Day - Day 11

Since it is the weekend and Thomas has never experienced my little blood work/ultrasound appointment, I decided to take him with me. 

Naturally we had Bette who only works 2 weekends a month and who was training a gal named Dora, so it was a little different then normal. But they still did the same stuff.

Depending on what my estrodial levels do, depends on whether or not tonight or tomorrow night is trigger night. I am still betting tonight, but we shall see. 

After we walked out, Thomas said, "I didn't know they played a counting video game with your ovaries!" Hehe! That guy! I love his unique view on life. But I can definitely see how he would think that with them measuring all the follicles on the screen.

Day 11 Numbers

Uterine lining - 5.6 (apparently 6 is perfect, but Bette said those people were rare)

Left - 

18.8

18.4

17

16.75

16.4

15

13.3

13

Right - 

20

17.5

17

16.75

16.5

16.5

15.3

14.6

14.4

12.5

Last round's numbers on Day 13, which was also final shot day were Left side:18, 2 @ 16, 2 @ 15, 3 @ 14, 13; Right side: 2 @ 18, 17, 2 @ 16, 15, 14

So I am doing even better then last time! Bette did say that they are waiting for my estrodial level to be the same or even drop because that means I am ready. And that is exactly what happened last time. Day 12 was  1703 and Day 13 was 1540. So we are hoping for anything under 1946 which was yesterday!

And I don't have any fun IVF related picture, but how about my new car? Which is kinda IVF related because my old Honda was stolen during my last day of bed rest Round 1 IVF. Man that was weird.

This is our 2011 VW Jetta Sportwagon. Welcome to the family little buddy. And yes, it will fit twins, triplets will be a stretch. But who are we kidding, if I have triplets I am never leaving my house!

Ok so in all my excitement that Monday is a go, I totally forgot to ask what my estrodial level was. 

BUT, MONDAY IS A GO!!!

So tonight is my last shot. Specifically at 10:45, I take the trigger shot which is ovidrel. That will make my eggs release and in 35 hours at 8:45 am on Monday morning I will have all my little follicles extracted. Yes, that is taking into account the day light savings weekend. 

Thomas is then having his appointment at 1:30 later that day. 

Good thing I already went to the bank this morning to get my (IV) drug money just in case! And even though this has happened once already, I still think it is a little odd that I have to give the anesthesiologist cash to put me under. 

But we are ready! Ready to get this show on the road! 

Rest day tomorrow, but Monday you will get the next update. 

See you all on the other side! Follicle free, but with many more embryos!

Yep, Still More Shots - Day 10

I feel like I am an echo. Everything is growing so well! 

This my friends, is my little sunflower seed looking left ovary.

There are 15 follicles just right here! 

But seriously, there are just so many right now. So many.

Day 10 Stats:

Uterine lining at 5.4 which is looking great. Apparently towards the end, the line in the middle fades and it all comes together. Which it is doing. Way to listen to instructions and do what you are supposed to do uterus!

Left:

17.6

3 @ 16

15.4

2 @ 14.3

13.8

13.7

3 @ 13.3

4 @ 12

4 @ 11.2

Right:

18.1

16.8

3 @ 15.1

14.1

13.2

4 @ 12.3

2 @ 11.5

2 @ 10

That is 35 of just the larger size people! Yikes! We are definitely getting close to softball size ovaries right now!

Our ultimate goal which I will hit either tomorrow or Sunday is to have most of them between 17 and 21 mm. So we are in the range for sure!

Now for some shots of Thomas giving me the shot in the leg last night.

There is my little over eager medic.

Action shot.

And in it goes. 

So only 1 or 2 more days of this shot update info. And then it will be a rest day, extraction day, daily update on the little embryos for (praying 5!) 3-5 days, then people, we sit and wait for 2 weeks. 

You all still in this with me? Getting closer and yet not quite done!

My estrodial levels today are 1946.

This is beautiful, but Dr Murrain does want me to lower my dose of follistim. 

Onward and upward with both of my shots though!

Shots - Day 9

Day 9. Whew! That means we have 2-3 days left of shots, a day of rest, and then extraction!

This morning's appointment was good. And sweet Charlene even printed off some pictures of everything going on in there! 

So below you see all my left follicles, my uterine lining, and my right follicles.

Before I tell you all the stats for today, let me tell you a little bit of wisdom. When your sweet husband agrees to meet you at a friends house, because you couldn't get home by 5:30 which is the shot hour, make sure you have told him the correct friend. Because having your hubby perturbed at you and then sticking you with sharp objects? Not smart!

Good thing Thomas is awesome and when I said that to him he started laughing and then proceeded to tell me to sit down because I was already 10 minutes late with getting my shot. :) This man wants us to succeed for sure!

OK, todays info. Day 9!

Uterine lining. 5.5 and triple. Remember I said I would get you a picture of the triple effect? If you look at the ultrasound, it is the connected dark white line across the middle. The lining kinda looks like the shape of lips to me. Charlene said that there is good estrogen effect in the lining

Left:

2 @ 12

2 @ 11

3 @ 10

9

2@7

Right:

15

3 @ 13

4 @ 11

3 @ 10

9

I think the ganirelix finally slowed everything down a little. 

But here we are compared to Round 1 Day 9

Which was left side: 1 @ 10, 3 @ 9, 4 @ 8

right: 1 @ 9, 2 @ 8, 1 @ 7

Again, I am definitely closer to my Round 1 Day 11 numbers today.

And clearly last round my left side was the leading lady and now this round my right side is clearly pulling the weight.

My estrodial levels today are at 1006!

Onward and upward people!!!

2 Shots Again! - Day 8

So last night went off without a hitch with my second shot. 

However, I promised you photos and let me tell you, trying to focus on not flexing my stomach or leg and take a picture at the same time? 

This is what you get.

Thomas being creepy.

A picture, really showing nothing other then my white stomach.

And a picture actually showing nothing other then my feet were really cold.

 Clearly I will have to try again tonight. Because clearly I cannot multi-task when it might possibly cause me pain.

The shot in my leg has the possibility to swell and bruise, but both last time and this time so far, nothing! Thank goodness!

And a side note. Last round was in the summer. I wore shorts in the summer and flip flops. I only noticed because for these shots, I have to change into shorts!

OK, now for the details you all really want.

Day 8 Info

So Mary informed me today that the day after you start ganirelix, it is possible that your follicles could not grow that much, along with your estrodial levels may not increase that much.

Welp. Not true for me.

Being day 8, the goal was to have my uterine lining over 8 mm. Mine is over 11 mm. Check.

Left - 

13.2

5@11.5

10.4

10

3 @ 9.2

4 @ 8.4

Right -

15.5

14

12.7

12.5

10

5 @ 9.5

4 @ 8.6 

Last round. 

My follicles were 1 @ 10 mm, 4 @ 8 mm, 5 @ 7 mm and my estrodial level was at 350.

So I now have a total of 29 good sized follicles! Again, no wonder I can feel my ovaries!

Also at this point I am taking extra electrolytes, extra protein, and extra water.

And my estrodial level today is at 730.

Onward with both shots!

Going Strong - Day 7

Today is going strong!

I started feeling my right side yesterday evening and as of this morning I can feel my left side too.

And I am only on day 7! I didn't start to feel anything until day 12 last time! Yikes!

But when I look at my numbers and how many follicles I have in there, it makes sense.

Here we go:

Uterine Lining - 5 mm and the triple effect.
(I will try and get a picture of that tomorrow)

Left:
12.7
11
2 @ 10.6
9.4
8.8
8.1
7.4

Right:
10
9
9 @ 8.5 (yes 9!)
8
7.1

That means I essentially have 21 10mm little follicles between my 2 ovaries. That is not even mentioning the little ones that Mary didn't even bother to measure. Last round they ended up taking out 24 total. This is awesome people! And I get why I can feel them.

And last time my follicles were this same size on day 10. So we are doing awesome!

Last time Day 7 I had a break because I wasn't progressing quick enough - Round 1
So no side to side comparison of numbers today.

These are a few of my little follicles on the right side.

And we heard from Charlene (my other nurse) and my estrodial levels are at 619.
Which means between my estrodial level and the size of my follicles, that I get to start ganirelix tonight. So a shot in my stomach and a shot in my leg!
The ganirelix is to stop my brain from producing the LH that tells my body to drop eggs into my follicles. Hold off little body! Hold off!
Pictures of that tomorrow. The shot, not the lack of my eggs dropping that is.

After yesterdays gorgeous sunrise, we wake up to this. 

 A rain boot day.

Foggy and beautiful in its own way kinda of a day.

Time to make some soup? Perhaps.

And since I am working from home, I get to curl up in my warm and cozy house and enjoy it?

Yep. Done.