The Crazy Emotions

As the time approaches where we learn if this FET cycle worked or not, my emotions are all over the place. Naturally I blame the estrogen, because I am normally not crazy. Or so I think.

So here is where my brain (and the estrogen) has taken me....

If this round does work and we get 2, oh crap. I could have 5 babies. FIVE! Ah!

Logic tells me that God won't give me more then I can handle. 

If this round does work and we get 1, seriously God?! You think I can only handle 1 kid?!

Logic tells me that God knows my prideful heart and will cut it down.

If this round doesn't work, so now there is something wrong with my body that it won't even accept 2 perfect little embryos?!

Logic tells me that even in perfect circumstances, it is only a 25-30% chance per perfect embryo for them to implant.

All in all, I say these hormones have thrown me on the crazy ride! 

But I have taken it one day at a time (actually the time has flown by) and I know regardless of what happens this round, that we have 3 more beautiful little embryos waiting to be given a chance at life. And God is good and He knows the perfect family that He has for us in His perfect timing.

Let me say that again so you all know the truth that I know.
God is good and knows our perfect family and when it will be perfect timing.

And no, I am not trying to convince myself of this. I know it is truth and I cling to it because this wild adventure He has given Thomas and I has been just that. Wild. And I have gone deeper with Him then I have ever imagined and seen the depths of His love. And I walk in the truth thankful, oh so thankful that I can cling to Jesus no matter what. 

And here are the beautiful things that have spoken to me in the time of waiting.
Thank you Pinterest.

I am just so thankful for His promises.

Amen.